Thursday, August 9, 2007
Saturday, August 4, 2007
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About Me
- carolineelie
- contact information, lheuredepoutine@gmail.com (514)978-5463, locals only.
moulez l'argile
STEPHANIE C., queen supreme.
l'heure de poutine: how old are you?
stephanie c.: 16.5
l'heure de poutine: we hear you're big on booze and cigs, so free cigs or free booze ?
stephanie c.: BOOZE.
l'heure de poutine: why booze ?
stephanie c.: the real question is, why not?
l'heure de poutine: point said and matched. so they say you're the cory kennedy of montreal, why ?
stephanie c.: because my friends are hip and attractive, and i've a complicated relationship with caroline e, the mark h. of MTL.
l'heure de poutine: caroline e. ? she sounds like a slut. or he.
stephanie c.: (s)he is, real easy. also a complete lush. but its alright, it's cool.
l'heure de poutine: we say you watch out for that slut. well, stephanie, you're unemployed right ?
stephanie c.: well see. i'm professionally fat and lazy. but a lot of people don't regard that as a profession, so i guess i am without a job. some people just don't get it, yeah.
l'heure de poutine: we feel ya'.
ALINA D., spiderbite.
l'heure de poutine: alina dirttymann, sixteen, the foxiest girl we know. how are you and the germans ?
alina d.: not on very good terms at the moment.
l'heure de poutine: too much dimmu borgir and tokio hotel ?
alina d.: and slipknot. and sauerkraut. it's all good though.
l'heure de poutine: we don't trust the germans really. they're always up to something. so you went treat shopping yesterday. we hear they let dogs into their shops, how queer.
alina d.: yes, that is true. i bought bags and bags of smurf shaped candy and other odd german things. i spoke french to the lady because i got this sudden fright i forgot all of it. she was totally cool with it.
l'heure de poutine: did you tell here you were from montréal and that montréal is better than any city in the world ?
alina d.: no, but i think my québec shirt told her alright.
l'heure de poutine: ha, take that ! oh us québecois. what is the exact date of your return to us ?
alina d.: august 10th. my flight is at 9:40 german time. meaning i should be back in montréal at around 1 or 2 in the afternoon.
l'heure de poutine: dinner and a show ?
alina d.: possibly possibly. if by show you mean strip club, then yes.
l'heure de poutine: obviously we mean strip club, i mean c'mon this is montréal afterall.
alina d.: there's this street called reeperbahn here in st. pauli that's strip club after strip club and it reminded me of ste. catherine/st. laurent. it was nice.
l'heure de poutine: this is why we love montréal. so besides strip clubs, crazy gothic germans, and pro-québecois. what have you been seeing/up to ? any german war museums ?
alina d.: no, none of that. visiting family, really. shopping, walking around, writing postcards, etc.
l'heure de poutine: alina, we expected better from you. i mean honestly. you're hot2trot.
alina d.: well, the germans do have a lot of jagermeister and beer lying around. the boys here aren't really for me.
l'heure de poutine: none of this ?
alina d.: i've seen enough blonde comb overs and light eyed boys for a while.
THE ANA HOWL, "a closet playwright"
l'heure de poutine: so, how old are you?
the ana howl: as old as i need to be.
l'heure de poutine: where were you born ?
the ana howl: out of my mothers womb.
l'heure de poutine: no c-section ?
the ana howl: i was not born like julius caesar, perhaps like brutus though.
l'heure de poutine: killing people is rude ? why ?
the ana howl:
rude: ill-mannered: socially incorrect in behavior
kill: cause to die; put to death, usually intentionally or knowingly
because intenionally being rude as in killing someone isn't very nice is it?
l'heure de poutine: what we mean to say is, look at dying people in the hospital, they want to die, so is that rude ?
the ana howl: well if they want to die i suppose its a different story, but killing someone with malicious intentions is entirely different than putting someone out of their misery.
l'heure de poutine: guess you're smarter than a fifth grader.
the ana howl: you know i've never seen that show
l'heure de poutine: truthfully either have we.
the ana howl: is this interview over ?
JESSICA M., in progress
MAX S., in progress
"the intern."
SPENCER L., in progress
SPENCER J., in progress
l'heure de poutine: so, how about the weather today, it was like a sauna.
spencer j.: not really actually, compared to recently it was quite painless, no?
l'heure de poutine: but with the heat and the rain at the exact same time.
spencer j.: true, very true. it fucked with my hair.
l'heure de poutine: and how (ana howl), so you're moving to kingston in a year ?
spencer j.: supposedly, giant place too you know. 80 acres and 40,000 trees.
l'heure de poutine: but it's a suburb, or even worst than a suburb right ?
spencer j.: it's on an island, it's a farm. but there's a boat every 8 minutes to a huge city. my next door neighbour is a cattle farm, breeding cows for meat.
l'heure de poutine: you're leaving montréal for cattle farmers, we think you're insane.
spencer j.: haha yeah, it really sounds like i'm living in the middle of nowhere, but really it's cool. plus i wouldn't really be living there... considering i'm off to university?
l'heure de poutine: oh, where to ? and what are you doing about cejep ? the bridge year twelve ?
spencer j.: yeah, one year of cegep in MTL to count as grade 12 in ontario. i'm at dawson and i'm in psychology, bleep bleep. still not sure which university i'm headed too, though.
l'heure de poutine: very nice, you're still sixteen if i remember correctly, turning seventeen the week after warped tour ?
spencer j.: week BEFORE warped tour. next monday. august 6th.
l'heure de poutine: we will be sure to pick you up something very nice from ottawa then.
KRISTINA D., malboro.
l'heure de poutine: you're from russian right ? how old were you when you came here ?
kristina d.: i was one when i came here. i came here with my mother.
l'heure de pountine: based on québec laws, if you're from an outside country and your parents weren't schooled in english in canada you have to go into french schooling. so you were put into french schooling right ?
kristina d.: yes i was. which sucks by the way. cuz i'm much better in english than french. so i kinda fail.
l'heure de poutine: shit, so why québec and not ontario or the prarie provinces ?
kristina d.: i don't know ask my dad. i'm probably going to move to toronto to study in a english school.
l'heure de poutine: like in the near future ? you're leaving us too ?
kristina d.: what do you mean by us?
l'heure de poutine: us meaning montréal, we are a nation.
kristina d.: if everything goes well i'm probably going to move to london it's my dream to move there.
l'heure de pountine: london, ontario or london, england ?
kristina d.: london england.
l'heure de poutine: oh lord ! that's far. you'll write to us right ?
kristina d.: i will of course. but if i move there it will be in a long time.
l'heure de poutine: we could never leave montréal, it's the city of saints. they should move the vatican here.
kristina d.: i love montréal but there's more out there to see. i can't be stuck here for ever.
l'heure de poutine: suppose you're right. anywho, you're sixteen now right ?
kristina d.: in september. 3. to be exact.
l'heure de poutine: aww, you're still a baby. but you're in year eleven right ? shouldn't you be in year ten ?
kristina d.: i'm going to secondary four. i redoubled.
l'heure de poutine: ah, we thought you were in secondary five. redoubled ? as in you had to re-do a year ? that b-i-t-e-s.
kristina d.: yup but i don't rly care.